O’s invited me to his friend’s wedding.. we haven’t had the girlfriend boyfriend chat so uh, what does this mean?!
Also now I’m wondering if he and his friend just invited me out of courtesy or if they are actually serious? It’s an out of town wedding too so I can’t just be casual about it, I need to know soon if I need to get flights. Ahhhhhh
My osteo told me to put an ice pack on my shoulders each night and that that would help loosen them up because it forces my body to circulate blood to that area. So here I am – ice pack numbing my shoulder blades. Hopefully this works!
The Oscars remind me that there is a whooolle other world out there full of insanely rich, glamorous people that I am entirely out of touch with.
Married at First Sight is so bad… but so good at the same time.
Today O was more affectionate and outspoken about the way he feels about me. I want to just enjoy it but skepticism lurks at the back of my mind- is it the alcohol that’s encouraging him to be more forthcoming? And if so, is it the truth of how he feels or is he just wanting to get some?
The earth is not in a good place. One of my friends was telling me the other day that her and her husband were considering not having children because all the evidence suggests that if we continue the way we’re going, the world will be in an irreparable state by 2040.
Hearing that has given me a new sense of urgency over climate change. It’s a valid point – is it selfish to bring children into a world which we’ve fucked up, and leave them with the burden of fixing things, if it’s even possible to fix?
This year I want to be more conscious about the waste that I produce and buy less packaged goods.
I’m going to another poetry event tonight, I like the way this week is going. Want to befriend every poet I meet.
I wish my life could just be eating out and going to poetry readings and writing about it all.
I want to be more proactive with my health this year – better eating and better exercising. More plant based foods and more movement in general.
When my reminder came up on my phone to write a post for today, I started thinking about how great it is that I’ve maintained this for 156 days. One hundred and fifty six. I thought about those first posts and where I was then, how wrecked I felt, with nothing left to be destroyed. And now, 156 days later, I’ve built new foundations from the rubble and each day I get higher and further away from the bits and pieces of the devastation.
In the last 156 days I’ve found happiness again, and learned to value both the exciting and mundane in life. I started dating someone new who cares about me, and who I really care about and makes me feel giddy like a teenager. Most of all, I have deepened friendships with my closest lady friends and that’s the most beautiful thing to come from this. They helped me put my heart back together.
